No, not from me. You should know better than that.

First, a warm welcome to Calvin, and a hearty congratulations to both Tiffany and Tyler! Yes, my friends aren't just getting married, now—they're becoming parents. (I do feel old when I think about it.) From the tales my folks tell me about my childhood, I'm gonna bet that Tiffany & Tyler will be mighty tired for the next couple years. Of course, theirs will be for an awesome reason, far removed from my usual "tired because I didn't bother going to sleep" shtick.

(I am, incidentally, confused about how such a large baby could have come from such a petite Tiffany....)

...

Speaking of friends getting married... my other bit of big news is Anna's engagement! I fall firmly into the camp of those who don't have a clue who the lucky stiff is (outside of his first name: Doug), but I'm sure he's a good man.