Today in my strategic management class we did actual stuff, but we ended the class by watching a fifteen minute excerpt from the made-for-TV movie about the fall of Enron, hilariously entitled The Crooked E. The first scene we watched was Ken Lay giving the troops a “we will not go quietly into the night!” speech, which Our Protagonist (the fresh up-and-comer who originally bought into things but now sees the light) walks out of. He then goes through this hilarious scene of anguished driving, where you can see out his windshield while also seeing his reflection in the glass. He looks like he’s constipated, and the scenery includes multiple LED signs with messages such as “Enron is CORRUPT” and “Enron is TEH SUCK” flashing on them. I suspect this was supposed to be a drug-induced dream for Our Protagonist.

Upon returning to Earth, we find Our Protagonist listless in his apartment. He receives a phone call (from the Enron higher-up who originally hooked Our Protagonist up with his sw33t job, my professor informs us), and goes to visit This Old Guy (the Enron higher-up). This Old Guy constantly pours himself drinks throughout the scene where he blathers on about how he, and others like him, were responsible for the cans (“and cans and cans”) of worms about to be dug up on Enron. He then makes some comment about how he’s actually looking forward to prison.

At this point temptation was too much for me, and I turned around to Scott and commented “yeah, that’s because he’s not going to federal pound me in the ass prison.” Scott cracked up, and mentioned something about conjugal visits.

Anyway, Our Protagonist then realizes that money isn’t where it’s at; rather, his girlfriend—Shannon Elizabeth (EH?)—is where it’s at. He drives up, apologizes, tells her that he called her father to apologize for hurting her (EH?), and then hugs her. The movie then fades to black.

I, in confusion, turn around and tap Scott with a fist, and then tell him that I’ll apologize to his father later today.