Capsule Review: The Island

The Island is mathematically equal to parts: the clonus horror.

Yes, that “parts: the clonus horror.” The one that MST3K ripped, and the one that I’ve seen two or three times in its MST3K variant.

They’re so much the same movie, that I’m honestly shocked that seemingly nobody has mentioned it. (disclaimer: I don’t get out much.)

Anyway, on to the math: take the exact same plot. Remove the critically acclaimed only you can prevent crotch fires! scene, but add a touch of hi, I’m Scarlett Johansson, and I’m hot. Take something away and add a bit of something else, and you end up back where you started. Q.E.D.


2 Responses to Capsule Review: The Island

  1. I followed the IMBD link for parts: the clonus horror and laughed out loud at the tagline:
    WARNING: The shock and horror of this film is unusually intense. It is not a film for the faint-hearted.
    It would probably be more intense and disturbing and less side-burstingly hilarious without Mike and the ‘bots mocking it all the way through. The taglines page ( also lists the tagline:
    Welcome to America.
    This is particularly appropriate if one considers this film, as Crow T. Robot suggested, to be a “social commentary on how we bag and freeze people in America.”
    RIP, MST3K


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